RUTH Langsford has heartbreakingly opened up about shedding her beloved sister to suicide – admitting she’ll “never know why”.
The Loose Women star spoke candidly about the agony she nonetheless feels haunted by questions that by no means go away.
Speaking on Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place podcast, Ruth, 66, stated: “I believe suicide is such a tragedy, and the folks left behind are simply left not figuring out why.
The TV star broke down in tears, saying: “Your query is simply: ‘Why? Why? Why?’
“As time has gone on, I’ve accepted that I’ll never know why and nothing will bring her back.”
She added: “The solely approach I could make any sense of it and cease it hurting is to know she didn’t wish to be right here and nothing I might have finished might have modified that.
“You simply assume you can have finished one thing. Why didn’t we see it? How might we not have seen it? Why didn’t she discuss to us?
“But there are no answers because she’ll never be able to tell us why.”
Ruth’s sister Julia Johnson, who had battled despair for years, was found dead aged 62 by her husband Paul at their Surrey residence in June 2019.
Ruth stated work turned her “lifeline” as she tried to deal with overwhelming grief.
She stated: “I simply miss her so a lot, however I do know she wouldn’t need me to have a tragic life. I did a number of crying and took time without work work.
“Then I thought, ‘She doesn’t want this for you – you need to get back out there.’ And work has always been my saviour.”
Ruth has known as 2019 the “hardest year” of her life after shedding Julia, and praised Eamonn Holmes for his “amazing support”.
She has additionally revealed she almost stop TV altogether after being left “heartbroken”.
Speaking to Best Magazine in 2020, she stated: “It seemed wrong to be cheery on screen when, inside, my heart was breaking.”
It was Eamonn who urged her to return to work in reminiscence of her sister after she admitted she had “no motivation or desire” to be in the general public eye.
After a month of “crying, screaming and sobbing”, Ruth stated he informed her she nonetheless had “so much to live for”.
The couple later break up in 2024 after 14 years of marriage.
Sharing a photograph alongside Julia in June 2019, Ruth informed followers: “My beautiful sis Julia has sadly died after a really lengthy sickness. My coronary heart is totally damaged.
“She was the kindest and most gentle soul and I will miss her forever. As I am sure you will appreciate, I need time to grieve with my family. Thank you for your understanding.”
If you may have been affected by any of the problems raised in this text, name Samaritans without cost on 116 123 or go to www.samaritans.org.
